Last One Outta Florida

I’d like to hope that I’m not one to mince words on a serious topic, so I’ll cut right to the point.

I’m queer.

I’m sure this means pretty much nothing to you, internet reader that came on to my page. That’s okay. It shouldn’t be a huge deal to you stranger. It’s not a huge deal to me.

I’m going to talk about it anyway though.

I’m so lucky, because accepting this facet of myself never caused me much grief. I was raised religiously and am also not the most observant person so it took me longer than I would have liked to realize, and that there is the only bother I have regarding it. I wish I had knew I was bisexual sooner.

I’m also very lucky, because I have a loving husband who loves me because of who I am, not in spite of this piece of me. My immediate family doesn’t know yet, and while they may not understand they will love me anyway.

However, everything is sunshine and rainbows (reference fully intended). I live in Florida. As time goes on, more laws are being passed in my state to make things harder for my community and adjacent communities. I can’t speak for every area in Florida, but things are getting bad in my area. Not long ago there was a horrible antisemitic demonstration less than a mile from my house and despite the authorities knowing nothing was done until the bigots got tired and left on their own accord.

Due to the nature of my marriage and general upbringing I’ve had the absolute privilege of flying under the radar so to speak. This has granted me safety, but too many times also given the closed minded individuals in my area the idea that. I’ll sympathize with their bullshit. My immediate family will almost certainly be accepting when I eventually tell them, but beyond them the rest of the clan would be pretty repulsed if they knew my truth. Things are not bad for me, yet it’s suffocating to know I’m often surrounded by people who would be disgusted with me.

I’m whining. I know that I am. Things could be so much worse and have been worse for those around me. My best friend is transgender and I’m so proud to have this pillar of my life finally living the way that makes him happy. As pleased as I am to see him growing into himself I’m just as distressed to consider how hard the future could become for him from external environmental pressure in addition to the already tumultuous process transitioning is.

I’m setting this to post sometime in the future in the hopes things might be better, and the sobering stress that it probably won’t be.

Get involved with your community, take care of your siblings in struggle. There is nothing wrong in you existing as you are.